Did I Ask For This?: Reflecting on My Career Choice After Two Crazy Weeks

The two weeks since my vacation have been hectic. I have had little time to focus on one topic. There are 63 unread messages in my email. I’ve been in 19 meetings ranging from fiscal planning to managing e-resources, improving technical services processes, reprising a diversity climate survey for library staff and receiving a conference update from colleagues. I have been preparing for meetings ad hoc, beginning about 20 minutes before their start, if at all. I have begun analyzing data for the department’s annual report. I have worked through three lunch breaks. Some important issues have not received my adequate attention and some have.

In my spare time (primarily my commute and work breaks) I finished reading Jonathan Safran Foer’s Eating Animals, which my university has assigned for incoming freshmen and transfer students. I started reading “Assessing the Cost and Value of Bibliographic Control” in the July issue of Library Resources & Technical Services.

While my time at work isn’t always so full, the past fortnight is not exceptional.

Before I earned my library degree, my work in library acquisitions usually involved one or two types of jobs in a given day. My responsibilities were technical and focused and I mastered them: I knew everything I needed to know to do my job as accurately as I could. The speed with which I could do my job’s duties gradually increased. I was a machine: a bibliographic searching machine, a firm ordering machine, a receiving and invoicing machine. I took pride in my efficiency and satisfaction in getting the job done. I left work at the office.

A few years ago I contributed a chapter, “From Paraprofessional to Department Head: Lessons in Cultivating a New Professional,” to Staff Development Strategies that Work!: Stories and Strategies from New Librarians, published by Neal-Schuman. In it I observed that formal library education, technical skills and experience were critical to my ability to lead a department, yet insufficient. I was surprised by how little control I had over my day-to-day work and my department’s priorities as a new department head.

Mastery in managing a department is elusive compared with the technical responsibilities I used to have; perfection is no longer within reach, much less conceivable. I took a case-based management class in library school and have had subsequent management training, but the tools I acquired in those sessions are just tools. Learning how to use them depends on situations that require them. I have learned about FMLA and grievance processes firsthand. I have addressed conflict between members of my department. I have experienced the death of a member of my staff, which engaged an entire suite of management and leadership skills. However, I don’t feel like I can truly master management: every situation and experience is new and I learn from it.

Time management is critical and difficult. Delegation remains a challenge for me. I have accepted the fact that I cannot give every single situation for which I have some responsibility my maximum effort and attention, but sometimes I can address it well enough.

I have days in which I wish I could spend my time with a stack of order requests to process, where I excel and my work is taken for granted. However, the rewards of a job well done are greater now. When I accomplish something, my colleagues and staff benefit directly and express their appreciation. As a professional, I am more engaged with the work that goes on outside my department. I have more opportunities and responsibility to contribute to the direction and success of the organization, often well beyond my job description.

I have embraced my role and accept the challenges it presents as opportunities. In the first paragraph, I describe my current situation as one of chaos or in which I cannot imagine catching up on everything before a new task presents itself. I also express the variety of ways in which I participate with other colleagues to further the institution’s mission. When I am overwhelmed by the number of tasks demanding my attention, I take it as a sign that I am trusted with important work. I enjoy my job and find the variety of work engaging and fulfilling.

What advice or stories do you have about adjusting to a professional career from a technical staff job? Have you decided management wasn’t for you and moved on to a different role, or have you grown in ways you never expected?